Location: Somewhere between Long Beach & Beverly Hills
I get a call from my uncle in-law Rich who is moving from Long Beach to Beverly Hills. He asks me if I could help him move and if I knew anyone else who would like to help.
I reply, “Gunja and I will help.”
He replies, “who?”
He says, “ok I got Timmy to help us also.”
We take the bus and meet Rich and Timmy at the rental truck company the next day. We show up with no signs of Rich and Timmy. All of a sudden we could hear the Snoop Dogg song “Gin and Juice.”
“With so much drama in the L-B-C
It’s kinda hard bein Snoop D-O-double-G
But I, somehow, some way
Keep comin up with funky ass shit like every single day”
Up rolls Rich and Timmy in the moving truck that had spraypaint all over it. They turn off the truck and get out to meet us. Timmy shows us that on one side spraypainted it said “5 greatest rappers of all time” with caricatures of Ice Cube, Ice T, Kool Keith, Vanilla Ice, and of course Dylan (Cuz he spit hot fire!). We all got a kick out of it and then decided it was time get moving.
Three of us could fit comfortably in the front and one had to ride in the back. Timmy said he’d ride in the back and I volunteered to ride with him. We got in the back while Rich and Gunja got in the front cab.
In the front they were sort of lagging to leave. So in the back, Timmy and I were getting along good and laughing at each other’s antics. Timmy began to talk about movies with cargo-vans and semis driving with the back door up or doors open.
Rich finally turned on the truck and began to proceed to his house taking as many back roads as possible. Dusti and Timmy were now talking about the opening scene from the original Beverly Hills Cop where Eddie Murphy is hanging out from the back of the semi full of cigarettes.
As we came to a stop sign on a fairly steep hill, Timmy decided to attempt to replicate that scene. In the front though, Gunja convinced Rich to try out the power of the lorry's engine. Just as Timmy was grabbing for the strap on the back, Rich punched it and Timmy fell to his knees just barely grabbing on to the back end of the vehicle. I was well in the back of the cargo section and could not react fast enough to help him out. Timmy hanged on and dragged by knees for about a block then fell on the pavement doing about ten somersaults before coming to a dusti crash on the side of the road.
I tried to get Rich and Gunja’s attention by pounding on the rear of the cab, but you know Gunja’s love of hip-hop music and the rapper Canibus. He was bumping “Dead By Design.”
“Who the fuck is you to criticize a lyrical king
you see, that’s my problem, I spit a thousand bars y’all was silent
I ain’t heard nothing about it
I had to give you three years to recognize
And then I realized, can’t nobody even fuck with my rhymes”
The only thing I could do is hang ten until the next time they stopped the vehicle which was not until we arrived in Rich’s neighborhood. Even then, Rich was pulling a series of California stops and I could not get out to alert them.
It was once we arrived at Rich’s house that I could tell them what had happened. They called out ‘bullshit’ but soon changed their minds upon looking in the back. We backtracked and finally found Timmy walking wearily on the side of the street. One of the most hilarious sights I had ever seen in my life was witnessed that day. We all laughed about it when we got back to Rich’s with the most hearty laugh coming from Tim, “grrgfh, grrgft, grrgft, grrgft!”