Location: San Diego, California

This hippy couple, Worf and Mary-Jane, were going out for the night and had to leave their small terrier, Nero, at home.

Worf’s mother (a huge Star Trek fan) had just left from being over on holiday. She couldn't stop talking about the highlight of her trip which was picking grapefruits from the neighbor’s tree. She left Worf a huge bag.

Worf and Mary-Jane were happy to see her go and get back to their usual hippy dippy routine. So this night they added in some special extras to make the night more interesting.

They did not do a good job of putting things away before leaving and it turns out that Nero got into and ate over an ounce of psychedelic mushrooms along with some tabs of acid they had left out.

When the couple got home early in the morning they walked into to the front door hearing the cartoon intro from Grape Ape blaring from the television.

“(Grape Ape!) Over 40 feet high!

(Grape Ape!) Just a little bit shy!

(Grape Ape!) What a super-strong guy!

(Yup, that’s me!) The Great Grape Ape!”

They could not find Nero anywhere. All the screaming in the world for this dog would come to no avail. It confused Worf because no windows, doors, or other exits were open and Nero was a very obedient dog that loved his owners very much.

Upon further investigation, Mary-Jane noticed that the drugs were gone and the top of the cupboard was somewhat trashed, but still, no sign of Nero. After giving up for a moment to eat dinner the couple retired to the living area to relax for a moment after the meal.

Mary-Jane joked with Worf “maybe Nero used his cloaking device.”

When they went to sit down on the couch Worf noticed that the middle two couch cushions were askew and that there was a burrowed spot in the center!

Nero had dug his way into the middle of the couch to take solace in the dark. Turns out that the vast amount of shrooms and acid, that would put a 200-pound man on his ass, had put the 18-pound dog into an intense hysteria that apparently caused him to lose his mind.

Mary-Jane and Worf tried on numerous occasions to get Nero out and to feed him. These attempts failed numerously. They could not understand fully why Nero would not move.

“Sure he’s wasted babe but that little guy was always so chipper and loving”, exclaimed Worf.

They decided to wait for a while to see if he would come back to normal. It was a week and a half later and Nero had yet to move much or eat anything. They knew that he was alive still because they could feel the heat and breathing from the outside of the old couch.

It became annoying because they couldn’t sit on the couch without hearing barks or whimpers. They had to bring in chairs from the kitchen to watch tv. Mary Jane had noticed that Worf had formed an irritating habit of lifting one of his legs over the back of the kitchen chair before he sat down in it. This then turned into a small argument between the couple as Worf refused to give up his new habit.

“Where did you learn this from” She would scream.

“From one of my old bosses, he was so cool, all the other ladies loved his style” He exclaimed.

“Well it’s not cool” She replied.

It became pretty obvious after all this time and effort, that only one option was left to the couple. Worf was tired of getting his arm bitten to shreds and Mary-Jane was over all of it. So they took the couch to the curb out by the street and left it there by the dumpster with the dog still burrowed in the middle of it.

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